It’s easy to want to ask your child, “How was your day at school?” as a way to get some insight into how their day went. However, you’re likely to get a brief, one-word answer if you ask the same question day after day.
If you’re looking to learn more about what’s going on in your child’s daily life, you’re not alone. With a little creativity and some well-thought-out questions, you can turn those vague responses into valuable discussions.
Here are 10 creative questions designed to encourage your child to share more about their day, along with tips for fostering an environment where open communication thrives.
1. “What was the highlight part of your day?”
This question shifts focus from the usual routine and encourages your child to share their favorite moment. It’s also helpful if your child tends to focus on negative aspects. Talking about the positive parts of their day can help them see that there’s always something good happening, even if it’s just lunchtime or recess.
2. “Did anything surprise you today?”
Surprises can range from an unexpected science experiment to being picked second for the kickball team. This question invites your child to reflect on the day’s events and share fun details you might not otherwise hear.
3. “Who were you proud of today?”
This question can promote social skills as it encourages your child to think about someone they were proud of. Whether they were excited that a friend got a good grade in math or proud of a classmate who joined a game at recess, this question helps them see the value in cheering for others instead of viewing everyone as competition.
4. “When did you feel proud of yourself today?”
In addition to recognizing why they feel proud of others, it’s important for kids to celebrate their own achievements. No matter how small something might seem, taking a moment to acknowledge a time when they were brave or kind can boost their confidence and reinforce positive behaviour.
5. “What’s one thing that could have gone better today?”
This question invites your child to express any frustrations or challenges they might have faced, giving you insights into areas where they might need support. It can also help them develop problem-solving skills and identify things they want to improve for the future.
6. “What interesting thing did you learn today?”
Encourage intellectual curiosity with open-ended questions that give them the freedom to share what fascinates them. Instead of asking about a specific subject or focusing on their test scores, this question allows them to talk about their interests and can foster a love of learning, no matter how they do on standardized tests.
7. “What did you do during recess?”
Recess is a crucial part of social and physical development. This question can lead to stories about friendships, teamwork, and play, revealing information about your child’s social skills. It’s good to know whether they spent their recess playing alone, chatting with friends, or joining in a group activity.
8. “Who were you kind to today?”
This question encourages empathy and selflessness. It prompts your child to think about how their acts of kindness can impact others. It also shows that you value kindness as much as academic success.
9. "What's a new activity you would like to try at school?"
This question can lead your child to share things they’re curious about, whether it’s a new club or learning a musical instrument. Sometimes kids get caught up in their current activities and forget to explore new ones. This question might remind them that there are plenty of other things to discover and try if they’re interested.
10. “What mistake did you learn from today?”
Kids need to know that mistakes aren’t something to be ashamed of, and they don’t define their intelligence. Instead, mistakes can be great learning opportunities. The more you normalize mistakes and failures, the more likely your child will be to take responsibility and learn from their errors.
Tips for Building an Open Communication Environment
To get the most out of these questions, it’s important to create a space where your child feels comfortable sharing. Here are some tips:
- Listen actively. Show real interest by keeping eye contact and reacting positively to what they say.
- Choose your timing. Your child may not be eager to talk as soon as they get home. You might find it better to have these conversations over dinner or after they’ve had some time to relax.
- Ask open-ended questions. Avoid bombarding them with too many questions, as your curiosity might feel like an interrogation. If your child doesn’t want to talk, move on to another topic to keep the conversation light.
- Model sharing. Share your day with them, demonstrating that it’s okay to talk about both the good and bad parts of your day.
- Avoid giving immediate advice. Resist the urge to tell your child what they should do if they mention a problem. Instead, ask them how they plan to handle the issue and help them work through it.
- Talk during activities. Direct eye contact can sometimes feel intense for kids. They might be more likely to open up while doing an activity, like colouring or playing catch.
Your conversations don’t have to be long or in-depth. Remember, the goal isn’t just to gather information but to connect and show your child that you care about their thoughts and feelings.