When it comes to understanding infidelity, the reasons behind men's unfaithfulness have been widely researched. Both scholars and the public are well aware of the possible explanations for why men cheat from psychological, evolutionary, and personal perspectives. However, the factors that lead women to cheat have not been studied as extensively. The motivations behind why women stray have long been debated, with no clear consensus.
However, recent research published in the journal 'Evolution and Human Behavior' tested various theories about what drives women to cheat. The study's final findings highlighted several motivations, but five factors stood out the most. These are the most common reasons why women are unfaithful.
1. Their Relationship Is No Longer Satisfying
The most common reason women give for cheating is being unhappy in their current relationship. An overwhelming 64.7% of women in the study supported this reason.
When asked about their decision to cheat, one participant candidly shared, "Honestly, I stayed with my partner because I was lonely, and then I didn't know how to break up with him. I never really loved him, but I felt stuck." This sentiment captures why many women stray they feel trapped in a relationship that doesn’t fulfill their emotional needs.
On the other hand, only 30.43% of men said that being unhappy in their relationship was their main reason for cheating. This difference points to a crucial gap: a lack of satisfaction in a relationship, whether due to ongoing conflict, a lack of intimacy, or simply a connection that has faded over time, seems to drive women toward infidelity far more than it does men. When the emotional bond weakens, women may seek comfort and validation outside their relationship.
2. Their Partner Seems Uninterested in Them
The second most common reason for women's infidelity, cited by 22.4% of participants, is the feeling that their partner is no longer interested in them or invested in the relationship.
According to one participant who felt this way, "I felt neglected by my partner at the time; he always worked late and had no time for me and our child. I ended up getting closer to another man who was always there for me when I needed help." These feelings of abandonment can drive women to seek a connection elsewhere, especially when their main relationship feels lacking.
Surprisingly, only 5.1% of men reported cheating for this reason, indicating that women are over four times more likely to stray due to feeling neglected. Clearly, for women, feeling unseen or unheard in a relationship puts them at a much higher risk of infidelity compared to men.
When women feel alone in their relationships whether emotionally, in terms of childcare, or with household responsibilities the desire for attention and care can lead them to form connections outside their primary relationship. They may seek the validation and support they miss at home.
3. They Want Revenge
Interestingly, 15.5% of women admitted that they cheated simply because they knew their partner was already cheating. One participant, when asked why she cheated, confessed that it was an act of revenge: "I found an email where he was clearly looking for other women to date on Craigslist."
Here, men and women differ significantly, with only 2.9% of men citing this as their reason for infidelity five times less than women. It seems that for women, revenge is a strong motivator.
Giving their partner a taste of their own medicine appears to be a powerful driving force, perhaps because it evens the score or gives them a sense of justice. Whatever the reason, when women feel wronged, the urge to seek revenge can be a strong motivation, pushing them to cheat as a form of emotional payback.
4. They’re Sexually Unsatisfied
The fourth most common reason for women's infidelity, at 8.6%, was sexual dissatisfaction. Interestingly, this is very similar to the men in the study, with 9.4% of them citing the same reason.
One participant shared how this dissatisfaction led her to explore other options: "I wanted to know I was still attractive and that other men wanted me, in case my partner ever cheated on me. Plus, I wanted to be more experienced in sex."
Whether it's a lack of good sex or not enough of it, a satisfying sex life seems just as crucial to women as it is to men. When this aspect of a relationship fades, women, like men, may take any steps necessary to fulfill it. The drive for a passionate and fulfilling sex life can be a powerful motivator, and when it’s missing, women aren’t above looking for that satisfaction outside their relationship.
5. They’re Bored
One participant's reason for her infidelity perfectly sums up the fifth motivation: "I was just bored in the relationship." This feeling is echoed by 7.8% of women in the study who cited boredom as their reason for cheating. Similarly, 5.2% of women attributed their infidelity to a need for novelty. It seems that when the routine of a relationship becomes monotonous, the allure of something new can be a strong pull.
In terms of boredom, men and women are nearly tied, with 5.8% of men also citing this as their reason for cheating. However, men are twice as likely to cheat out of a need for novelty, with 10.9% giving this reason.
Clearly, when a relationship starts to feel like stale water, with nothing new or exciting happening sexually, emotionally, or in terms of present and future plans, women, like men, may seek excitement elsewhere. The search for something new, whether they realize it or not, might show that the fun and excitement they've been wanting is outside their relationship. From here, one thing can lead to another the quest for novelty can progress into infidelity as the desire for a fresh, thrilling experience becomes too strong to resist.