Do you know the story of Narcissus? The very handsome figure in Greek mythology who, due to his detachment and disdain for others, was punished by the gods to fall in love with his own reflection. He was so captivated by his beauty that he couldn't pull himself away from his own image, eventually leading to his demise.
Well, according to recent research, the spirit of Narcissus is alive and well in today's generation, and selfishness is thriving in America. To ensure we're on the same page, self-absorption is a personality trait linked with narcissism, egocentrism, an overestimation of one's own importance and abilities, a tendency towards selfishness, and a disregard for others.
A study found that 30% of young people were classified as narcissistic according to a widely used psychological test. This number has increased twofold over the past 30 years. Another study reported a 40 percent decline in empathy among young people since the 1980s, a trait inversely related to self-absorption.
These findings aren't surprising for anyone who observes the "it's all about me" culture we currently live in. I'm curious about the causes of the increase in narcissism and how it will affect our society in the future.
One obvious source where young people learn about selfishness is our pervasive and relentless popular culture. A study by celebrity psychologist Dr. Drew, in which 200 "celebrities" (I use the term loosely because the bar for being considered a celebrity has dropped significantly) completed the Narcissistic Personality Inventory, found that they were significantly more narcissistic than everyone else. Interestingly, celebrities who actually had talent, like musicians, tended to be less narcissistic. Guess who were the most narcissistic celebrities? Female reality TV stars! It's not surprising that those famous for being famous were the most self-absorbed; their selfishness drove them to become celebrities.
Another fascinating study that was just published analyzed changes in song lyrics over the past several decades. Researchers discovered a noticeable increase in song lyrics using more self-centered words like "I" and "me" instead of "we" and "us," and a move from positive to angry and aggressive language. And these findings aren't just due to the increased popularity and influence of hip-hop music (known for its glorification of the artists and its aggression), but rather are evident across musical genres.
Moreover, you don't have to go far to gather your own data on selfishness. Do you recognize these names: Charlie Sheen, Terrell Owens, and Kanye West?
It's not surprising to see a rise in narcissism in this generation given that young people are bombarded by these messages 24/7 through every form of media. And here's the really troubling part: How can young people today avoid being infected with this "disease" when, due to the "wired" world in which they live, most of the messages they receive idolize and encourage selfishness?
The self-esteem movement has likely contributed to this increase in self-absorption. Many parents today do everything they can to make their children feel good about themselves. The result has been a decline in genuine self-esteem and an increase in self-love and undeserved personal "superiority."
Likewise, technology and social media have played their part in promoting narcissism. All the time spent absorbed in screens has reduced the amount of real human (i.e., face-to-face) interaction that kids have, thereby depriving them of the experiences necessary to develop essential social skills like empathy, compassion, and consideration for others.
Certainly, the shift in societal values from community and towards individualism ("You're on your own"), away from civic duty and towards self-gratification, and away from meaningful contributions to society and towards personal achievement (as defined by wealth, power, and status), have also contributed to the social messages of selfishness in which young people are currently immersed.
It's one thing to notice that there are a growing number of narcissists in America today. However, the real issue isn't the narcissistic individuals around us, but when our society starts to accept and even promote their behavior, accepts selfishness as the norm. And that time may have arrived. That's when we need to start asking the next question which is far more frightening: What impact will this increasingly normalized culture of selfishness have on our society?
You could argue that selfishness has existed as long as humans have populated the Earth and we've managed to survive. In fact, some experts have argued that the recent rise in narcissism is due more to this generation's willingness to express what they really believe rather than an actual increase in selfishness. But there seems to be a qualitative, rather than a quantitative, change in so many aspects of our culture that I just don't buy that explanation.
The answer that came most readily to my mind, and a disturbing one at that, is a gradual, yet relentless, tear in the fabric of our society. Consider all the qualities that enable us to form a functioning and vital nation - respect, compassion, tolerance, kindness - and you will see that they don't exist in the narcissistic personality (or culture). Wow, I just had a really scary thought. The indifference, pretension, disrespect, and lack of consideration that are central to selfishness are also reflective of the increasingly polarized and toxic tone of our current political climate, recent unethical corporate behavior, the rise in cheating among students in school, and the array of bad behavior among professional athletes. As famously quoted by Pogo, "We have encountered the enemy and it is ourselves."
Definitely not a rosy picture and definitely not one to encourage an optimistic view of the future. Should we see this trend as just another sign of the impending fall of the American empire? The skeptic in me (and, as my readers know, it's a big part of my thinking) would definitely say "Yes!"
However, I remain hopeful despite challenges. I don't intend to criticize this generation entirely. There are many remarkable young individuals out there. When I visit schools across the U.S., I encounter motivated, respectful, and compassionate young people, which always gives me hope. Many young people are bucking the trend and are resisting the lure of the "dark side." And they are our best hope of pushing back the tide of self-absorption and keeping the best of humanity alive and well in America.