6 Signs You Might Be Comfortably Numb to Your Emotions
If you’re emotionally numb, it can be hard to tell
that you are. You’ve learned not to feel certain emotions, and life has become
easier in many ways because of it. You don’t cry when you get hurt; you don’t
scream when you’re angry; and you definitely don’t care that much about
anything that happens in the world around you.
1) Discomfort with
emotions
As a human being, you have the ability to experience a
wide range of emotions. The more time you spend avoiding unpleasant feelings,
the more uncomfortable you'll become with them. This can lead to a disconnected
sense of self and an inability to feel empathy for others. If you notice any of
these six signs of emotional inhibition schema in your day-to-day life, it
might be time for some soul searching. Take a moment to explore what's
preventing you from feeling your emotions, so that you can gain control over
them again. It is possible that one of the following factors is holding you
back:
Grief: When we grieve a
loss or are grieving on someone else's behalf, it can feel impossible to share
our pain with others. Grief can also cause us to detach from people in order to
protect ourselves. Sharing your thoughts about this loss with someone who
understands will help you find peace and make room for healing.
Shame: Shame has two
different effects on us: It may prevent us from experiencing emotion at all, or
it may cause us to focus excessively on our failures as a way of distracting
ourselves from other painful feelings like shame. Identifying where the source of
this shame stems from, and developing healthy coping skills, will allow you to
move past it and start living a happier life.
Anxiety: Anxiety often
causes us to shut down emotionally because we're constantly worrying about
worst case scenarios happening. In order to start calming those anxious
feelings, take care of yourself by setting boundaries between work/home life
and eliminating toxic people/situations from your life. Recognize when you're
projecting onto something or if you're trying too hard not to show
emotion--both are ways anxiety manifests itself in daily activities.
2) Poor emotional
awareness
In the DSM-5, there is no emotional inhibition
diagnosis. However, people who are unable to feel or express their emotions
often have a host of other psychological and mental health conditions. The
following is a list of 6 signs that you might be comfortable numb to your
emotions:
1) Difficulty identifying feelings – One major sign
that you are comforatbly numb is difficulty identifying feelings. If you don't
know what you're feeling, then it's hard to know how to process those feelings
and appropriately share them with others.
2) Difficulty expressing feelings
– Another symptom of emotional inhibition schema is difficulty expressing
feelings with others. This can lead people into bottling up all their emotions
which can cause additional problems in the long run like depression or anxiety.
It's important to identify these feelings so they can be processed
appropriately and shared with others.
3) Lack of emotional intensity – Another sign of
emotional inhibition schema is a lack of intense emotions. It may seem like
life events don't really phase you or create any deep emotion inside. On the
contrary, this person may go through life without ever experiencing anything
very deeply, especially positive emotion as well as strong negative ones such
as anger or sadness.
4) Unable to understand own
emotions -
An inability to understand one's own emotions also points towards emotional
inhibition schema because it means that they can't accurately identify what
they are feeling at any given time so they aren't able to take appropriate
steps in addressing the issue at hand.
5) Constantly justifying behaviors/actions
- People who use denial to cope with difficult situations will tend to come up
with excuses for why they did something wrong instead of taking accountability
for their actions. These justifications usually make little sense, but provide
them some kind of way out from facing the reality of what happened.
6)
Unstable moods - A final sign that someone is dealing
with emotional inhibition schema is mood swings; where someone can feel good
about themselves one minute and terrible the next. There isn't a constant happy
medium because they swing between feeling on top of the world to being
completely despondent and lifeless.
3) Difficulty expressing
emotions
It's easy to feel numb when a loved one has passed
away or when you're in the middle of a really difficult time. It can be hard
for many people to express emotions, but often it's because they don't know
how. They may have grown up in a family where emotions weren't talked about or
feelings were ignored. But there are some signs that you might be comfortably
numb and not even know it. The first sign is difficulty expressing emotions. If
you find it difficult to cry, empathize with someone who is grieving or react
normally in response to an emotional event then this could be a sign of
emotional inhibition schema. The second sign is using shoulds on yourself: Do I
look like I'm ok? Do I sound happy enough? Am I grieving enough? When these
shoulds start coming from within rather than from outside sources then they can
lead to feeling uncomfortable with your own emotion. A third symptom is
criticizing yourself as soon as something happens: As soon as we say something
dumb at work we judge ourselves harshly instead of realizing that we're only
human and made an error in judgment- which happens sometimes! Another symptom
of emotional inhibition is that perfectionism: We never want to make mistakes
so we set unrealistic goals and standards for ourselves and get mad at
ourselves when we inevitably fail. Finally, another symptom of emotional
inhibition schema is denial. There are times where it's good to block out
emotions temporarily in order to deal with a more serious issue- but if you
find yourself doing this habitually then it might be indicative of an unhealthy
tendency towards avoiding negative feelings.
4) Fear of negative
evaluation
The fear of negative evaluation is also known as
social anxiety disorder, and is characterized by an excessive fear of being
judged or embarrassed in public. People with this disorder may be afraid to
speak up for themselves and are often preoccupied with what other people think
about them. This can lead them to make decisions based on how it will affect
other people rather than what they want for themselves.
Other signs that someone might be comfortably numb are
if they avoid taking risks because they don't want anything to go wrong, or if
they feel like there's nothing left worth fighting for. They may worry too much
about the future, their past mistakes, or the needs of other people instead of
focusing on their own needs. In extreme cases, a person suffering from social
anxiety disorder may become depressed or even contemplate suicide. If you're
feeling anxious about how you appear to others, chances are high that you're
uncomfortable showing your true self to others.
The next sign of emotional inhibition is called
perfectionism: those who struggle with perfectionism have unrealistic standards
and expectations for themselves that they constantly strive towards but never
meet. If you find yourself feeling chronically unsatisfied or always
dissatisfied with your work then you likely suffer from some degree of
perfectionism. The more time invested in a task increases its importance; but
at some point, any additional time spent becomes counterproductive since the
work won't get better no matter how long we spend trying to perfect it. Perfectionists
tend not only have high standards for themselves but also put pressure on other
people around them.
5) Social isolation
If you find yourself withdrawing from people and
feeling like you have no friends, this is one of the warning signs of emotional
inhibition schema. If you're isolating yourself from society because you don't
want to be around other people, it can be difficult to break out of the cycle.
One way to combat this is by trying out new activities that put you in the
company of others. This might be something as simple as going for a jog or
cooking dinner with a friend. It can also be helpful to talk about what's going
on and how it makes you feel with someone who cares about your wellbeing or
close family member or friend. The more emotionally connected you are with
those around you, the easier it will be to regain some sense of belonging and
connection. As an added bonus, isolation can make you susceptible to anxiety
attacks and depression. So try not to shut everyone else out just because they
don't understand what's going on with you. Find ways to interact with them and
show them that you do care about them. The important thing here is to make sure
you're getting enough social contact while avoiding too much exposure so that
it doesn't overwhelm you.
6) Unhealthy coping
mechanisms
Many people are able to
function in their day-to-day lives without feeling any emotions. They may think
of themselves as being fine. But this is a type of coping mechanism called
emotional inhibition schema, and it's a sign that you're in need of some
serious self-care.
1.
If you are
constantly on guard, trying not to let your feelings show or if you have a
tendency to bottle up your emotions, this could be a sign that you're
comfortable numb.
2.
If you feel numb
all the time and don't know what it feels like to be sad or angry, then this
could also be indicative of emotional inhibition.
3.
When you realize
that everything in your life has felt gray and void of color, it's important to
take action before things get worse.
4.
People who are
uncomfortable with their own feelings will go out of their way to avoid feeling
them at all costs.
5.
You may find
yourself constantly seeking out distractions just so you don't have to deal
with anything else but when it starts impacting other aspects of your life such
as work or relationships, this might be a warning sign.
6.
Finally, there's
no shame in asking for help from someone who can provide assistance from an
objective viewpoint. Sometimes we just need someone outside our own head
telling us the truth about how we really feel - even if it hurts - so we can
move forward.